God working

Have you seen God working lately?  Was He working on you or through you? Can you look back on a time in your life and realize that God was in fact working?

There have been so many times in my life that I later looked back and realized that God was in fact working either for me or through me.  On Sunday we had an amazing speaker Dr. Samuel Thomas of Hope Givers.  If you have never heard him please google him and find out what all amazing things he does.  Some of the things that stuck with me were all of the children he has brought in and taken care of as well as all of the burnt women he has taken in.  The orphans come to know God through Dr. Thomas and his organization.  The burnt women no longer fear being set on fire, but instead learn that they can spend eternity with God.  How amazing of a man to run this organization.  Oh and he has had 20 attempted assignations on his life.  Really, we worry about the smallest craziest thing and this man has people trying to kill him because he is showing God's love.  I sat there feeling like I am not doing enough for God.  Please keep Dr. Samuel Thomas in your prayers as his government has said that his organization is their target to shut down.

On Wednesday I had an interview and felt God working on me before the interview.  I had some spare time, so I went to a parking lot to work on my Beautiful Mess Bible Study, and then just asked God to lead me to what He wanted me to read and know.  I flipped in my Bible to Ecclesiastes 2 and my eyes went directly to 2:8.  I ended up reading all of the way through Ecclesiastes 2:8.  It spoke directly to my heart and was exactly what I needed to hear/read.  I finished reading, prayed, and headed to my interview.  I walked in without any stress, any anxiety,   and knew that God was right there with me.

That night I went to my Beautiful Mess class, and again felt God wanting me to do more.  As my amazing leader was speaking of her trip to Africa last week she spoke about some women that she met with.  These women were Muslims, but allowed her to share God with them.  There were great examples of how God was also on the trip and showing His love.  As class went on I felt drawn to do something for these women.  I suggested that our class "adopt" that group of women, and send them ideas that they may not ordinarily be able to get.  The women in the class supported the idea, and now we are praying to see how God wants us to show them His love.  Please be in prayer for us to know what to send these women.

How is God working in your life right now?  Are you asking Him to work through you?

"But God"

So I had been out running errands.  As I headed home, I stopped at an intersection and noticed the car across from me had a tag on the front that said "But God".

How often does God tell us something and our response is "but God"?  Now I do not know the person driving the car or their meaning behind the tag, but I could only think of when we question God.  I could question God about why I lost my job, why I haven't found a job, etc.  However, at the end of the day I should never say "but God". God has told me before to speak to someone or to handle a situation a certain way and I will be honest I have said "but God". How many times have you felt God leading you a certain direction and you hesitated, you questioned the direction, or maybe you just pushed that feeling away?  That was you saying "but God".

This view may say or think some of the following:
"But God"
 - doesn't love me
 - put me here
 - left me
 - let this happen to me
 - took my loved one
 - doesn't care
 - doesn't hear me

Now of course there can be two views to this tag.  I do not know that the driver questions God.  Maybe instead it was an answer to a problem.  When we are faced with a hard situation we can say "but God" as in "but God has the answer".  Maybe we do not have the solution, but God does.  Have you been faced with a decision and while you did not know which way to turn you were able to say "but God does".  Maybe the doctor said they can't cure your illness, "but God can".  Maybe you have been in an abusive relationship and have been told that no one loves you, "but God does".  We can either turn to God or trust God.

This view may say or think some of the following:
"But God"
 - loves me
 - uplifts me
 - cares for me
 - wants the best for me
 - shields me
 - has mercy on me
 - has given me more than I ever deserved

As with the tag on the car, it is all about perspective and how we CHOOSE to see things.  We can see an ending as exactly that, or a new beginning.  We can have faith that God has us, or we can doubt His love for us.  In life we often see "but God" as our response to God, not our response to the world about God.  My God loves me, cares for me, uplifts me, holds me in His right hand, and only wants the best for me.  So the next time I am faced with a situation I CHOOSE to trust His plan for me over my plan for myself.  He knows what the future holds and what the plan is for my life.

Which view of "but God" do you have, and does that change based on your life circumstance?

How would you describe yourself?

Take a moment and describe yourself.  If you were talking to someone who had never met you how would you describe yourself? Calm, energetic, clown, full of life, organized, unorganized, optimistic, tall, short, average, fat, skinny, pretty, ugly, not good enough, fun, or any other way you would describe yourself. 

Now think of why you labeled yourself with those words.  Is it something you have dealt with for years, how you see yourself compared to others, or have you been told that you are that way?  We often describe ourselves based on how the world tells us to.  However, that is not an accurate description because you are a child of God.

"How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!" (1 John 3:1, NIV)

We need to look at how God sees us. Keep in mind that God sent His son to die for us, so how He sees us is way more important than how the world sees us.  

Do you describe yourself based on your sin? (broken, dirty, useless, unworthy, etc)  Maybe you had a bad experience in life and feel that it defines who you are.  Maybe you have struggled with a sin, and can't forgive yourself for choices that you made.  God has forgiven you, and you need to forgive yourself.  I have made bad choices and bad decisions in the past, but if I confess my sin and God can forgive me then I should be able to forgive myself.

"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:9 NIV)

Do you describe yourself based on the world, and how others may see you? (tall, skinny, pretty, fat, ugly, etc) We need to look to God not to man.  Man will let you down time and time again but God will not. 

"In God I trust and am not afraid. What can man do to me?" (Psalm 56:11 NIV)

Do you describe yourself based on what others have? (poor, jobless, childless, etc) Please do not miss God and your life by wanting what others have.  God has a plan for you and your life.  The plan that God has for you is specific to you, and trust that the plan is what is best for you.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future".(Jeremiah 29:11 NIV)

Now look back at your list and mark through all of the labels that the world has put on you.  You are made new with God!  

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!" (2 Corinthians 5:17 NIV)

Isn't that great news?  We do not have to worry about our past, God cleaned the slate when he sent His son to die for us.  Imagine the amount of love that God has for us that He could send His own child to die for us.  Now as you read the Bible and grow closer to God you can see new ways to describe yourself - through God's eyes.

God is where you are

I am participating in a class at church on Beautiful Mess Motherhood for Every Moment. It has been such a blessing and we are only on week two!  This class was perfect timing for me. 

One thing that stuck out to me is that God is where you are. How often have we been in a bad spot and wondered where God was?  We often feel that God has left us during difficult times, but He is always there with us. He may be guiding our steps, showing us something we need to learn about ourselves, or possibly waiting for us to simply turn to Him. He wants to handle our bad moments just as much as He should be praised during our high moments. He isn't just tree when we are floating on clouds but He is also there when we are at our lowest. 

During my journey with infertility I realized that God not only wanted me to learn things about myself but he also wanted me to turn to Him and trust Him with what I was experiencing. He didn't just want to be there for the positive pregnacy test, but He was there for all of the negative pregnancy tests as well. 

With the loss of my Dad God was right there with me as well. He was talking to me, making me move when I didn't want to, and changing my heart. He wasn't just there when my Dad told me that he loved me but He was also there when my dad got upset with me. He was there trough the whole relationship: the good, the bad, and the ugly. 

Are you acknowledging God when He is with you all of the time or just during the high points?  Are you turning to Him during low points? Most of all are you trusting Him trough all of the lows, middles, and highs?  

Jesus loves me!

When I lost my job I told everyone that I would not start to stress until the middle of this month.  I took on the approach that finding a job was now my job.  My husband laughed and said that he would wait until the end of the month before he started stressing.  

Yesterday on the way to daycare I ran across 3 patches of ice, so decided it was safer to come back home.  We played with toys, read books, danced, and made fake snow.  Finally it was nap time, she was tired and so was I.  She wanted me to cuddle her, which of course I didn't hesitate.  She asked me to sing to her, and when I asked what song she was quick to respond "Jesus loves me".  As I began singing she joined in.  I felt as if God knew that was the exact song I not only needed to sing at the moment, but I also needed to hear. 

So today is the 15th, the middle of the month.  I have taken the steps to get insurance coverage, I have submitted my claim for unemployment, and have submitted many applications and resumes.  While I still do not have a job, I do have a peace.  I have the peace that God loves me, and He is working for me.  I am not going to say that there haven't been moments of stress and panic, in fact I had two of those moments this morning.  However, I have a peace knowing that God is working to open a door to an amazing opportunity.  I may not know what this opportunity is yet, but I know it is going to be amazing.  Am I going to stress - no.  Am I going to panic - I hope not.  Am I going to stop looking for a job - no.  Am I going to trust that something amazing is coming - YES!  

While God is working for me I still have to do my end of the work too.  I can't just sit back and say God has this, and not do the work I need to do.  I can't wait for the job to find me.  I can't wait for the opportunity to find me.  I have to do my end of it as well.  Giving the problem to God doesn't mean that our work is finished.  Sometimes giving the problem to God ends up putting more work on us because God shows us things that we need to do.  God works for us, but we have to work for ourselves as well.  God can send us the perfect opportunity but if we do not do the work to maintain it, then we will lose it.

While I am waiting for the blessing, I am also working for the blessing.  I am looking at myself, my work ethic, my budget, my relationship with God, and how I need to improve myself.  Have you ever found that when you give a problem to God He shows you things that you need to work on as well?

A time for everything

I started this post with one direction, but God led me in a different direction.  I was led to the following scripture.

Ecclesiates 3: 1-8

A Time for Everything

1For everything there is a season,

a time for every activity under heaven.

2A time to be born and a time to die.

A time to plant and a time to harvest.

3A time to kill and a time to heal.

A time to tear down and a time to build up.

4A time to cry and a time to laugh.

A time to grieve and a time to dance.

5A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.

A time to embrace and a time to turn away.

6A time to search and a time to quit searching.

A time to keep and a time to throw away.

7A time to tear and a time to mend.

A time to be quiet and a time to speak.

8A time to love and a time to hate.

A time for war and a time for peace.

While I am still trying to find the reason God led me to this scripture, I realize that right now I am going through a a season of life that I know God is blessing me through.  Through this I am being shown who I am, and who the people around me are.  Looking back at the descriptions in the scripture I have been hurt, scattered, searching, and torn in the past couple of months.  God has blessed me with some wonderful people and experiences through this season.  I am being encouraged by some of the most amazing friends, and it amazes me how much I learn about myself when I look at my friends.  I have friends who will uplift me, friends who will encourage me, and friends who are helping me through this season.  I think God is telling me that this is just a season, and it will come to an end.  In the past few months I have lost my dad, lost my job, but I never lost God!  I never try to focus on the negative, so in the past few months I have gained peace regarding my relationship with my dad, gained an understanding of God having a bigger and better plan for me, and gained knowledge of myself.  I have had to look at things about myself that I haven't looked at in a long time.  I was in a place of comfort in life - comfort in my job, comfort in my friendships, comfort in what I was doing.  However, God wanted me to do more.  Reach more people for Him through my job, have Christian healthy meaningful friendships, and do more in life.  I have began taking a class at church regarding parenting to improve how I see myself as a parent.  I have applied for jobs that are completely out of my comfort zone, but I felt like that was what I needed.  I have focused more on my relationship with God and praising Him for all of the blessings in my life.  I could sit here and dwell on the things lost, but oh so much more has been gained.

Again, I may look back this afternoon and see that God was leading me to this scripture for a completely different reason.  However, I now see how this trial I am going through is just a season, and as we all know seasons come to an end.

Life verse

Have you ever picked a verse, memorized it, and focused on it for a difficult time in life?  I had not done this prior to dealing with infertility.  During the infertility journey, I can't even remember how, but I came across Proverbs 3:5 "Trust the Lord with all your heart, do not lean on your own understanding".  Wow what a verse to step on my toes.

Did you notice that it doesn't say trust your coworker, your boss, your spouse, your doctor, your neighbor, or even your parents?  It says trust the LORD!  How often do we put our trust in man?  And how often does man let us down?  Now think about when the Lord let you down... still thinking aren't you.

Moving on from that it says with ALL your heart.  Not part of it, not a 1/4 of it but ALL of it.  This becomes hard if our trust isn't in the Lord.  If we trust man then we think man will pull us out of the situation, so the Lord only gets part of our trust.  In the end we are let down, broken, and hurt by man and turn back to the Lord.  Why did we ever turn to man over the Lord?  We put our trust in someone else then find ourselves back in the same position.

Why do you think it says not to lean on own understanding?  I think it is because our mind will lead us down a path we don't need to go down.  For example, during infertility my mind went to I did something wrong, I don't deserve a child, and all of these reasons that I wasn't getting pregnant.  Maybe it just wasn't the right timing?  Instead of waiting on God's timing I was trying to make it my own.  Look where my understanding got me.  Upset, wondering what I did wrong, wondering why I was being punished, and looking around at pregnant women wondering why they could have a child and I couldn't.  This past weekend would have been my cousin's birthday, but we lost her to cancer when she was 20 years old.  We do not know why, but I know that God had a plan for her and her life.  There are a lot of things in life that we will not understand, but God has a reason for it.

I believe that God lead me to this verse so that I would realize that He had it ALL under control.  Since that experience this has become my life verse.  I have it written, posted, embroidered, and most of all repeat it to myself very often.  It seems to be valuable for all aspects of life.  I am often praying this verse, even today because I do not want to put the world before God.

What is your life verse?  Why does this verse fit you, and what lead you to this verse?  If you do not have a life verse I encourage you to get one.