Today I was taken back in time to October 2014.
I had received a text from my best friend that her mom wasn't doing well. I told her I would be there after church. After church Emma, my mom, and myself stopped by the hospital. We visited for a few minutes then I need to get Em to lunch, so we left to meet Steve. While eating I asked Steve to take care of other stuff because I felt the need to get back to the hospital.
I went back to the hospital was able to get some laughs in with my friend and her family. I hope I was able to distract my friend's mind for a few minutes during that time Then I was taken back in time. Back to a different hospital, a different surrounding of family, but oh so similar in so many ways. Realizing that you have to say goodbye, realizing life was forever changing, and realizing you would never be the same person again. I watched as my friend went to say her last goodbye and my heart broke. I know that feeling, I know that moment of what do I do, and I know the feelings that follow. Here was a major difference it was her mom. As a female we all know how we are over our moms, and here she was having to say goodbye.
She lost her mother, and her life has now forever changed. There were many tears shed today, and there will be more shed in the future. The future for my friend has changed forever, and for that my heart breaks. I can lend an ear, a shoulder to cry on, and shed my own tears for her, but I can never change what happened today.
Her dad broke my heart when he said "those were the hardest words I have ever had to day". Can you imagine saying goodbye to your spouse, mother of your two daughters, and being completely lost without her? Life proves that we will all have to say goodbyes that are hard, but we also know that because of God's love we can see our loved ones again.
Maybe it isn't goodbye, but a see you later?
Sunday, November 22, 2015
Friday, November 6, 2015
Things I am thankful for...
I just wanted to show you some of the things I have already been thankful for this month.
My husband who is my best friend. The past year hasn't been the best year for us because of a lot of changes, but he stayed constant. He was my rock, my friend, and telling me not to worry about it because everything would work out.
The beach is my calming place. I stand in awe of God's creations. To tell the waves where to stop so they don't flood the earth. The birds, sand, and my favorite sea turtles.
My family. We may not always agree but we still love each other.
That God sent me this wonderful man to share my life with.
Monday, November 2, 2015
Month of being Thankful
November is here and that means the busy holiday season is just round the corner. We often get caught up in the rat race and don't take time to truly thank God. I started a few years ago taking time each day to think of what I am thankful for. Sadly I often forget to do this the rest of the year, but try to do it daily for November. We should be thankful every day for all of the blessing bestowed on us, not just during prayer on Thanksgiving Day.
What are you thankful for today? I will be honest the first few days are very easy for me because they include my Savior Jesus Christ, my family, friends, spouse, child, and all of the everyday people in my life. Towards the end of the month it gets a little harder.
So lets start this together! I will do a post each day with something I am thankful for, and you can comment what you are thankful for.
I started this yesterday in which I was thankful for my Savior Jesus Christ who never turns his back on me regardless of what I do. He is full of mercy, grace, and love that we can't find anywhere else. I have walked away from him, and came back knowing he was there waiting for me. He never turns from me, even when I upset him.
Today I am thankful for the rainy day. The rain waters the plants, foods, and animals; however, it also typically leads to an evening of cuddles and book reading for us. I used to love rainy days when I was in school because I would always have soup and grilled cheese to eat that day. Even then the rain was a sign to slow down and enjoy things. If it is pretty we are typically outside, running errands, or on the go. However, when it rains everyone talks about going home, cuddling up with a blanket and a book. For me I love to hear the rain, especially thunderstorms, and cuddle up with Emma watch a video or read a book and enjoy my evening with her.
What are you thankful for today?
What are you thankful for today? I will be honest the first few days are very easy for me because they include my Savior Jesus Christ, my family, friends, spouse, child, and all of the everyday people in my life. Towards the end of the month it gets a little harder.
So lets start this together! I will do a post each day with something I am thankful for, and you can comment what you are thankful for.
I started this yesterday in which I was thankful for my Savior Jesus Christ who never turns his back on me regardless of what I do. He is full of mercy, grace, and love that we can't find anywhere else. I have walked away from him, and came back knowing he was there waiting for me. He never turns from me, even when I upset him.
Today I am thankful for the rainy day. The rain waters the plants, foods, and animals; however, it also typically leads to an evening of cuddles and book reading for us. I used to love rainy days when I was in school because I would always have soup and grilled cheese to eat that day. Even then the rain was a sign to slow down and enjoy things. If it is pretty we are typically outside, running errands, or on the go. However, when it rains everyone talks about going home, cuddling up with a blanket and a book. For me I love to hear the rain, especially thunderstorms, and cuddle up with Emma watch a video or read a book and enjoy my evening with her.
What are you thankful for today?
Tuesday, October 27, 2015
How do you...
Handle a chilly, rainy day?
Do you sulk all day and tell everyone how miserable it is or do you take time to think about how things would be if it didn't rain? I grew up loving rain, from smelling it before it started raining to hearing it hit the tin roof. Of course there are days you may not want it to rain, but what if it never rained again?
Handle disappointment?
Do you begin going into your shell so others can't hurt you? As humans we will deal with disappointments in humans, but never in God. If we put all of our trust and faith in human then you will begin shutting everyone out because it is a dangerous way to live. However, with placing your faith, value, and hope in God all opportunities open up.
Talk to God?
Do you only talk to God when you want or need something, or do you praise the blessings already bestowed on you? We often get caught up when we are on top of the world and forget who those blessings have come from. However, as soon as one small thing happens we are quick to turn to God asking why this was allowed to happen. Maybe this happened so you would talk to God, maybe He missed you.
Talk about God?
Do you let the light of God's love shine through you or is God even seen through your talk? You aren't showing God's love if you are degrading, judging, criticizing, etc. Do not get me wrong if something is done against God's word you should speak of God's word, but you do that in love not anger. We should ask God to allow Himself to be shown through us - our words and actions.
Handle tests of faith?
Do you run to God or away from God? If there is a test of faith do you dig in deeper with God, or wait for the world to fix your problems? Often we wait for the problem to work itself out, but never turn to God who already knows the outcome. We have to trust that God does have a plan for us, and it is for the best for us.
As you can see any situation can be taken different ways. You can choose to let it direct you one way, or you can choose to respond a particular way. Here is the key - YOU. You get to choose, you get to decide your response, and no one else can choose it for you. While someone may upset you, it is still YOUR choice how you respond not theirs. As we tell our children, make good choices, and choose wisely.
Do you sulk all day and tell everyone how miserable it is or do you take time to think about how things would be if it didn't rain? I grew up loving rain, from smelling it before it started raining to hearing it hit the tin roof. Of course there are days you may not want it to rain, but what if it never rained again?
Handle disappointment?
Do you begin going into your shell so others can't hurt you? As humans we will deal with disappointments in humans, but never in God. If we put all of our trust and faith in human then you will begin shutting everyone out because it is a dangerous way to live. However, with placing your faith, value, and hope in God all opportunities open up.
Talk to God?
Do you only talk to God when you want or need something, or do you praise the blessings already bestowed on you? We often get caught up when we are on top of the world and forget who those blessings have come from. However, as soon as one small thing happens we are quick to turn to God asking why this was allowed to happen. Maybe this happened so you would talk to God, maybe He missed you.
Talk about God?
Do you let the light of God's love shine through you or is God even seen through your talk? You aren't showing God's love if you are degrading, judging, criticizing, etc. Do not get me wrong if something is done against God's word you should speak of God's word, but you do that in love not anger. We should ask God to allow Himself to be shown through us - our words and actions.
Handle tests of faith?
Do you run to God or away from God? If there is a test of faith do you dig in deeper with God, or wait for the world to fix your problems? Often we wait for the problem to work itself out, but never turn to God who already knows the outcome. We have to trust that God does have a plan for us, and it is for the best for us.
As you can see any situation can be taken different ways. You can choose to let it direct you one way, or you can choose to respond a particular way. Here is the key - YOU. You get to choose, you get to decide your response, and no one else can choose it for you. While someone may upset you, it is still YOUR choice how you respond not theirs. As we tell our children, make good choices, and choose wisely.
Wednesday, October 21, 2015
I saw the sign, and it opened up my eyes...
Yes, that was a song by Ace of Base several years ago.
As we go through life we often have signs to guide us. Everyday we see stop signs, directional signs, and road signs. We become immune to them because we see them so often. However, do you ever stop in your tracks because of a sign? Granted you should stop at a stop sign, but I am talking about signs to direct your life. Maybe it relates to your job, your family, and the most important ones typically relate to your faith.
I love when a sign pops up and grabs my attention. You may be thinking that it has never happened to you, but I bet it has even if it hasn't caught your attention. Have you ever been driving down the road and looked at the sunset? Have you ever looked up at night to see the stars? I enjoy looking at the wonderful works that God does. Emma will get out of the truck when we get home at night, look up to the sky, and all she says is "Wow". The wonder in her eyes tells me that seeing the stars is a sign for her. A sign of God, something bigger than herself, and something that takes your breath away. I have the same experience standing at the ocean. God directs the waves, controls how far the waves go, and has sand dunes as barriers.
Other times I sense signs from others. My amazing, beautiful, inspirational friend Gail who we lost to cancer loved flamingos. When I started my new job last week, I was looking through the desk which had been cleaned out and stopped in my tracks. There in the drawer was a postcard with different colored flamingo on it. A couple of days later, I was asked to work on a project for work and when I pulled out the example to go by the following quote was on it "We are, each of us, angels with only one wing; and we can only fly by embracing one another" Luciano de Crescenzo. Another sign - this same quote was put on a picture of me and Gail when she passed away. I knew coming into this job, that my heart was in it and now I see it as signs of I am exactly where I am supposed to be.
The signs that I love to see the most are the signs that my faith is growing. I find myself in conversation being able to quote scripture, or being able to relate a situation to scripture. In the past two years this is something that I have noticed, and each time I thank God that He gave me the words for that situation. I cannot sit here and tell you everything in the Bible, but that is something I am working on.
I encourage you to take the time to look for signs, look for God's wonderful works around you, and then thank Him for those. There is always a silver lining, sometimes you just have to look for it. You may wonder how the Ace of Base song ties in but the last part of the song is:
I challenge you to look for those signs today, and let God open your eyes.
As we go through life we often have signs to guide us. Everyday we see stop signs, directional signs, and road signs. We become immune to them because we see them so often. However, do you ever stop in your tracks because of a sign? Granted you should stop at a stop sign, but I am talking about signs to direct your life. Maybe it relates to your job, your family, and the most important ones typically relate to your faith.
I love when a sign pops up and grabs my attention. You may be thinking that it has never happened to you, but I bet it has even if it hasn't caught your attention. Have you ever been driving down the road and looked at the sunset? Have you ever looked up at night to see the stars? I enjoy looking at the wonderful works that God does. Emma will get out of the truck when we get home at night, look up to the sky, and all she says is "Wow". The wonder in her eyes tells me that seeing the stars is a sign for her. A sign of God, something bigger than herself, and something that takes your breath away. I have the same experience standing at the ocean. God directs the waves, controls how far the waves go, and has sand dunes as barriers.
Other times I sense signs from others. My amazing, beautiful, inspirational friend Gail who we lost to cancer loved flamingos. When I started my new job last week, I was looking through the desk which had been cleaned out and stopped in my tracks. There in the drawer was a postcard with different colored flamingo on it. A couple of days later, I was asked to work on a project for work and when I pulled out the example to go by the following quote was on it "We are, each of us, angels with only one wing; and we can only fly by embracing one another" Luciano de Crescenzo. Another sign - this same quote was put on a picture of me and Gail when she passed away. I knew coming into this job, that my heart was in it and now I see it as signs of I am exactly where I am supposed to be.
The signs that I love to see the most are the signs that my faith is growing. I find myself in conversation being able to quote scripture, or being able to relate a situation to scripture. In the past two years this is something that I have noticed, and each time I thank God that He gave me the words for that situation. I cannot sit here and tell you everything in the Bible, but that is something I am working on.
I encourage you to take the time to look for signs, look for God's wonderful works around you, and then thank Him for those. There is always a silver lining, sometimes you just have to look for it. You may wonder how the Ace of Base song ties in but the last part of the song is:
I saw the sign
And it opened up my eyes, I saw the sign
I challenge you to look for those signs today, and let God open your eyes.
Monday, October 19, 2015
Steps of Faith
It has been way too long since I wrote on this blog, but I have been busy taking steps of faith. I was offered a job in July, and accepted. This was a step of faith as I was going out of my comfort zone. I would be doing something completely new, different, town, different office, and different schedule of life. The nerves kicked in, but I knew I had to do something as the stress of not having a job was closing in on me. At the same time I knew this position was a test of me stepping out on faith, trusting that God would completely take care of me.
The job ended up being a very trying time, and I knew it was becoming a mere stepping stone for me. I was learning new things and stepping out on faith, but I knew there was another plan coming. I was then contacted about a different position that while it was another pay cut, it was something my heart is in. I decided to accept that position while again taking that step of faith.
You may be reading this and thinking how could I keep taking those steps. That was the easy part I knew God was guiding my steps, I knew God was working on a plan for me, and most of all I knew the steps were leading me to where I need to be.
Then came the test - the phone call that could have been a job with more money, but not a job that was a good fit for me at this point in my life. I prayed, questioned myself, prayed, and ultimately decided I had to follow my heart to where I thought I was led to go. I started the new position and love it. I go home feeling like myself again, and still trust that God will take care of the rest.
Matthews 6:26 tells us "Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?" How can I believe that God provided for the birds, but will not provide for me? Why am I less to Him than the birds? If you read on in Matthew 10:31 "So don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows".
How important am I to God? My initial thought is how far would I go to provide for my child, then wouldn't God go that far for His child as well? Yes, He sent His son to die for me. He took away all of my sin. He created me, and has a plan for my life.
The job ended up being a very trying time, and I knew it was becoming a mere stepping stone for me. I was learning new things and stepping out on faith, but I knew there was another plan coming. I was then contacted about a different position that while it was another pay cut, it was something my heart is in. I decided to accept that position while again taking that step of faith.
You may be reading this and thinking how could I keep taking those steps. That was the easy part I knew God was guiding my steps, I knew God was working on a plan for me, and most of all I knew the steps were leading me to where I need to be.
Then came the test - the phone call that could have been a job with more money, but not a job that was a good fit for me at this point in my life. I prayed, questioned myself, prayed, and ultimately decided I had to follow my heart to where I thought I was led to go. I started the new position and love it. I go home feeling like myself again, and still trust that God will take care of the rest.
Matthews 6:26 tells us "Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?" How can I believe that God provided for the birds, but will not provide for me? Why am I less to Him than the birds? If you read on in Matthew 10:31 "So don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows".
How important am I to God? My initial thought is how far would I go to provide for my child, then wouldn't God go that far for His child as well? Yes, He sent His son to die for me. He took away all of my sin. He created me, and has a plan for my life.
If you think about steps of faith do you try to question their size? Was that a huge leap of faith or s small step. Next time you are thinking about that look at it this way. It isn't the size of the step that matters - it is the size of your faith. If my faith wasn't the size that it is I wouldn't have trusted enough to step into the first job, or the second job.
I am not saying that my faith takes all questions, self-doubt, etc but instead it gives me the peace of knowing that God does have a plan for my life, and He does care for me. I do not ask for praise for stepping out in faith, but I do ask for praise to God for allowing those steps to fall into place.
Sunday, May 10, 2015
Mother's Day
Mother's Day is often a hard day for many women. Maybe they have lost their mom, lost their child, have never had a child, or have pain from their mom. I am close to my mom, but learned through infertility that Mother's Day is hard. I didn't struggle with it as much as others do, but again that is something that is individualized. As a mom I see Mother's Day as another day to thank God for giving me Emma, for if He hadn't I wouldn't be a mommy.
God chose me to be her Mommy - how awesome is that. He trusts me to raise His child, to care for her, to love her as He loves her, and to be a difference in the world. I see that as such an amazing blessing, and never want to take that for granted. Emma changed my life, and changed me. I do not see the world like I used to, and I am not how I was.
Garth Brooks sings a song about his mama, and I cry every time I hear it. I have posted a link to the video below.
The other link is to Kenny Chesney's Wild Child song. One of my best friends sent this to me saying it was about me and Emma. Of course now every time I hear it I begin crying.
While I am so honored to be a mommy, I still find myself not posting a lot on Mother's Day because I know other women are aching and hurting wanting this same title. God has a plan for their life just as He did for me. We have to trust the plan. Proverbs 3:5 trust the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding.
http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=garth+brooks+mama+song&qpvt=garth+brooks+mama+song&FORM=VDRE#view=detail&mid=C1FF8FCABA08B63F0A99C1FF8FCABA08B63F0A99
http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=kenny+chesney+wild+child&qs=LS&sk=VI1&FORM=QBVR&pq=kenny%20chesney%20wi&sc=8-16&sp=2&qs=LS&sk=VI1#view=detail&mid=CFCB9542D7C35792216FCFCB9542D7C35792216F
Happy Mother's Day!
God chose me to be her Mommy - how awesome is that. He trusts me to raise His child, to care for her, to love her as He loves her, and to be a difference in the world. I see that as such an amazing blessing, and never want to take that for granted. Emma changed my life, and changed me. I do not see the world like I used to, and I am not how I was.
Garth Brooks sings a song about his mama, and I cry every time I hear it. I have posted a link to the video below.
The other link is to Kenny Chesney's Wild Child song. One of my best friends sent this to me saying it was about me and Emma. Of course now every time I hear it I begin crying.
While I am so honored to be a mommy, I still find myself not posting a lot on Mother's Day because I know other women are aching and hurting wanting this same title. God has a plan for their life just as He did for me. We have to trust the plan. Proverbs 3:5 trust the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding.
http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=garth+brooks+mama+song&qpvt=garth+brooks+mama+song&FORM=VDRE#view=detail&mid=C1FF8FCABA08B63F0A99C1FF8FCABA08B63F0A99
http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=kenny+chesney+wild+child&qs=LS&sk=VI1&FORM=QBVR&pq=kenny%20chesney%20wi&sc=8-16&sp=2&qs=LS&sk=VI1#view=detail&mid=CFCB9542D7C35792216FCFCB9542D7C35792216F
Happy Mother's Day!
Sunday, April 26, 2015
When satan attacks
First of all I want to apologize for not posting anything for a month now. I could say a million reasons, but those would be excuses to not only you but also myself. The truth is that over the past month satan has been attacking me. I have not been sick, I have not been injured, or anything like that. Instead satan attacked me mentally. You see when satan attacks, he takes it serious and does not give in because he is waiting for you to give in. You see he kept attacking waiting for me to give in, and in a way I did.
I felt like I wasn't wanted by employers, I wasn't important to them, or maybe I wasn't the person I had thought I was. You see I had loved my job, I had the best boss and coworkers I could ask for. the sad part is that since I lost my job, I also lost some friends. I had said from the beginning that God had a plan for me, I just didn't know what it was yet. I had this mentality for over 6 months, and never questioned it. Until this past month, and then satan's mental attack started to sound real. I didn't doubt God, I doubted myself. I doubted if I was good enough, smart enough, and honestly if I was enough. I hadn't gotten a job, had some emotional times regarding family, and with Relay For Life I had encountered some issues. Here were three areas that satan saw my weakness and attacked even harder. How ironic that all of this took place around Easter?
Last week I was getting over my pity party, and served my regular service at church helping with the preschool ministry. I was scheduled for one class room, but got moved to a different room. I had always worked with the ages younger than Em because that was my comfort zone. Well, imagine my shock when they moved me to the 4 year old room. Of course the children and wonderful teacher was very welcoming. We were talking about Jesus appearing to people after his death, and how we celebrate him being alive today. So we watched a story, read scripture, and made a craft. While talking about Jesus being alive we had the word alive taped on the floor for the children to hope and spell the word alive. As I stood there watching the children it hit me like a ton of bricks. Alive spelt backwards is evil. WOW from live to evil. I stood there in shock and them explained it to the teacher, both of us stood there staring at the floor. Jesus had put me in this room because he knew exactly what I needed.
Now think back I said I didn't doubt God, I doubted myself. Guess what, that means I was doubting God. God made me, loves me, and has a plan for my life. How can I question who I am without questioning the God that made me? I can't. Psalms 139:13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I am learning more and more about myself everyday, and through that I am also learning more about God. Just remember that when you doubt yourself you are doubting God. Trust him and turn to him.
I felt like I wasn't wanted by employers, I wasn't important to them, or maybe I wasn't the person I had thought I was. You see I had loved my job, I had the best boss and coworkers I could ask for. the sad part is that since I lost my job, I also lost some friends. I had said from the beginning that God had a plan for me, I just didn't know what it was yet. I had this mentality for over 6 months, and never questioned it. Until this past month, and then satan's mental attack started to sound real. I didn't doubt God, I doubted myself. I doubted if I was good enough, smart enough, and honestly if I was enough. I hadn't gotten a job, had some emotional times regarding family, and with Relay For Life I had encountered some issues. Here were three areas that satan saw my weakness and attacked even harder. How ironic that all of this took place around Easter?
Last week I was getting over my pity party, and served my regular service at church helping with the preschool ministry. I was scheduled for one class room, but got moved to a different room. I had always worked with the ages younger than Em because that was my comfort zone. Well, imagine my shock when they moved me to the 4 year old room. Of course the children and wonderful teacher was very welcoming. We were talking about Jesus appearing to people after his death, and how we celebrate him being alive today. So we watched a story, read scripture, and made a craft. While talking about Jesus being alive we had the word alive taped on the floor for the children to hope and spell the word alive. As I stood there watching the children it hit me like a ton of bricks. Alive spelt backwards is evil. WOW from live to evil. I stood there in shock and them explained it to the teacher, both of us stood there staring at the floor. Jesus had put me in this room because he knew exactly what I needed.
Now think back I said I didn't doubt God, I doubted myself. Guess what, that means I was doubting God. God made me, loves me, and has a plan for my life. How can I question who I am without questioning the God that made me? I can't. Psalms 139:13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I am learning more and more about myself everyday, and through that I am also learning more about God. Just remember that when you doubt yourself you are doubting God. Trust him and turn to him.
Monday, March 23, 2015
Christian entitlement
How often do you encounter Christian entitlement? It may be the person that tells you how much better they are than you because they attend church. Maybe their church is "better" than yours. Maybe they come across that they have no sin. Maybe you attend the same church and they act like something is owed to them. Once you start thinking about it chances are that you have encountered it a lot more often than you should. In all honesty you should never encounter it.
Why would a Christian feel entitled to anything? I don't have the answer to that unless it is their pride, greed, or selfishness. When you think you are entitled to something because you are a Christian then you have completely missed the mark. We are entitled to something as human -- HELL. We are not entitled to anything beyond that but God gives us his grace, love, and mercy. We are not entitled to those blessings from God but he still gives it to us because he loves us. Christians then take those blessings and turn them into entitlement. That is not the purpose of those blessings. We are supposed to take those blessing and share God's love. Instead we get a sense of entitlement and turn others from God.
God created us, sent His son to die for us, Jesus died for our sin but then we think we are entitled to something. No. God is entitled to his kingdom being expanded, and us praising him. What have we done for God that we should be entitled to anything? We placed the burden of sin on his son, we placed the hurt in his heart, and we placed hurt in the world. Why would we then be entitled to anything but hell? Instead God saves us, and gives us eternal life.
The next time you feel that you are better than others, or entitled to something because you are a Christian just remember a few things:
1 - the only thing you are entitled to is Hell
2 - you should praise God and bring others to Him, not use his love to drive them away
3 - what has God given for you vs what you have given for him
4 - why not share God's love instead of us it against others
5 - what if you are the only Christian the person sees today - what impression will you be leaving on them?
Why would a Christian feel entitled to anything? I don't have the answer to that unless it is their pride, greed, or selfishness. When you think you are entitled to something because you are a Christian then you have completely missed the mark. We are entitled to something as human -- HELL. We are not entitled to anything beyond that but God gives us his grace, love, and mercy. We are not entitled to those blessings from God but he still gives it to us because he loves us. Christians then take those blessings and turn them into entitlement. That is not the purpose of those blessings. We are supposed to take those blessing and share God's love. Instead we get a sense of entitlement and turn others from God.
God created us, sent His son to die for us, Jesus died for our sin but then we think we are entitled to something. No. God is entitled to his kingdom being expanded, and us praising him. What have we done for God that we should be entitled to anything? We placed the burden of sin on his son, we placed the hurt in his heart, and we placed hurt in the world. Why would we then be entitled to anything but hell? Instead God saves us, and gives us eternal life.
The next time you feel that you are better than others, or entitled to something because you are a Christian just remember a few things:
1 - the only thing you are entitled to is Hell
2 - you should praise God and bring others to Him, not use his love to drive them away
3 - what has God given for you vs what you have given for him
4 - why not share God's love instead of us it against others
5 - what if you are the only Christian the person sees today - what impression will you be leaving on them?
Friday, March 20, 2015
Who will step up?
In today's society we are often being persecuted as Christians. You can turn on the news, read on the internet, or open a newspaper and read about Christians being murdered in other countries. You may initially think "gad that is not here", well I agree that maybe Christians aren't being murdered here. However, Christians are being persecuted daily regardless of where they live.
Christians read books, see moves, listen to music, and even say things that make God cringe. However, some are quick to judge because "I am a Christian, and they aren't so I am better". Sorry to inform you but you are wrong. We are all broken people, we all have sin, and we all have a chance to change our lives.
Last year in my home county there was a huge debate over gay marriage because a magistrate was forced to resign when he voiced his religion to the judges stating that he couldn't preform a marriage. Some came out saying it was his job so it didn't matter what his religious beliefs were. Some said it was just a political stunt. Some came out supporting him and some came out against him. Can you guess which side Christians were on? Actually there were on all sides. I saw Christians who strongly voiced their opinion against gay marriage attacking Christians who came out supporting this man. I heard Christians talking bad of other Christians based on their standpoint on this topic. The most shocking part for me were the Christians persecuting other Christians. Name calling, hateful words, mean actions, and shocking comments. You may think this isn't persecution of Christians so lets look at the definition.
Persecution - hostility and ill-treatment, especially because of race or political or religious beliefs
To be persecuted doesn't mean you are killed, doesn't mean you are caused bodily harm, it means the treatment. Do you think you win anything by persecuting fellow Christians? Maybe you gain pride, stance in your group of friends, and maybe gain acknowledgement from others. However, you do not gain from God.
2 Timothy 3:12 Indeed, all who desire to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted
Notice it doesn't say will persecute but instead says will be persecuted? When a Christian is persecuted we can take that and glorify God. We have to stop persecuting each other. If we see a fellow Christian hurting we hurt with them, if we see them rejoicing we rejoice with them, but we should never persecute each other.
Due to persecution Christians have become quiet. We don't want to mention God and upset someone, don't want to end a friendship by talking about God, and don't stand up when other Christians are being persecuted. This has to stop because we are to share the joy of God, we are to lead others to Him, and help each other. We have to speak up, talk about God, and join together with other Christians.
Imagine walking into a church for the first time and you hear two in the church talking about another church member. Imagine walking into a restaurant and hearing people gossiping about someone, and then you realize they are gossiping about their preacher. Maybe you hear people talking about someone and then see them sitting next to each other at church. What are they showing you? There is a longer list of what they are not showing you verses what they are showing you. the first thing on the list is that they are not showing you how a Christian should behave.
We have to be conscience of what we say and what we do because the world is waiting for us to act unchristian so they can use that as evidence against us. We are all human and we all mess up. However, we can use those moments as teaching moments for others. We can explain how we are sinners, but we have a God that forgives ALL of us! We can't go around acting like we are perfect, because we aren't. If you ask non-churchgoers why they don't go to church many will tell you it is full of hypocrites. How true is that? You may say no it isn't. However, it is sad that we act as if we are perfect and don't sin.
I challenge you to a couple of things 1) do not persecute other Christians but instead pray for them and step up for the ones being persecuted 2) do not act as if you have never sinned because all of us have and by pretending that we haven't we do become a hypocrite.
Christians read books, see moves, listen to music, and even say things that make God cringe. However, some are quick to judge because "I am a Christian, and they aren't so I am better". Sorry to inform you but you are wrong. We are all broken people, we all have sin, and we all have a chance to change our lives.
Last year in my home county there was a huge debate over gay marriage because a magistrate was forced to resign when he voiced his religion to the judges stating that he couldn't preform a marriage. Some came out saying it was his job so it didn't matter what his religious beliefs were. Some said it was just a political stunt. Some came out supporting him and some came out against him. Can you guess which side Christians were on? Actually there were on all sides. I saw Christians who strongly voiced their opinion against gay marriage attacking Christians who came out supporting this man. I heard Christians talking bad of other Christians based on their standpoint on this topic. The most shocking part for me were the Christians persecuting other Christians. Name calling, hateful words, mean actions, and shocking comments. You may think this isn't persecution of Christians so lets look at the definition.
Persecution - hostility and ill-treatment, especially because of race or political or religious beliefs
To be persecuted doesn't mean you are killed, doesn't mean you are caused bodily harm, it means the treatment. Do you think you win anything by persecuting fellow Christians? Maybe you gain pride, stance in your group of friends, and maybe gain acknowledgement from others. However, you do not gain from God.
2 Timothy 3:12 Indeed, all who desire to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted
Notice it doesn't say will persecute but instead says will be persecuted? When a Christian is persecuted we can take that and glorify God. We have to stop persecuting each other. If we see a fellow Christian hurting we hurt with them, if we see them rejoicing we rejoice with them, but we should never persecute each other.
Due to persecution Christians have become quiet. We don't want to mention God and upset someone, don't want to end a friendship by talking about God, and don't stand up when other Christians are being persecuted. This has to stop because we are to share the joy of God, we are to lead others to Him, and help each other. We have to speak up, talk about God, and join together with other Christians.
Imagine walking into a church for the first time and you hear two in the church talking about another church member. Imagine walking into a restaurant and hearing people gossiping about someone, and then you realize they are gossiping about their preacher. Maybe you hear people talking about someone and then see them sitting next to each other at church. What are they showing you? There is a longer list of what they are not showing you verses what they are showing you. the first thing on the list is that they are not showing you how a Christian should behave.
We have to be conscience of what we say and what we do because the world is waiting for us to act unchristian so they can use that as evidence against us. We are all human and we all mess up. However, we can use those moments as teaching moments for others. We can explain how we are sinners, but we have a God that forgives ALL of us! We can't go around acting like we are perfect, because we aren't. If you ask non-churchgoers why they don't go to church many will tell you it is full of hypocrites. How true is that? You may say no it isn't. However, it is sad that we act as if we are perfect and don't sin.
I challenge you to a couple of things 1) do not persecute other Christians but instead pray for them and step up for the ones being persecuted 2) do not act as if you have never sinned because all of us have and by pretending that we haven't we do become a hypocrite.
Friday, March 13, 2015
The importance of church community
How often do you participate in a community within your church? Do you just go to service and leave, or do you find yourself drawn to being more involved?
Our church is very large and while some fear that the personal relationships would be impacted. I believe that you can go to a church of hundreds and still be connected just like you can go to a church of twenty and be disconnected. Regardless of the size of the church you have to make an effort and follow through to connect. The church is supposed to encourage, support, motivate, and help you. However you have to step up to be a part of the community in the church.
I have been helping in our preschool ministry for a couple of years and love it. I meet more of the parents, get to love on the babies, and grow closer to people serving in the preschool ministry. I have taken some classes at church and become part of those communities. I feel a closer connection to not only my church through these but also to God and fellow Christians. These relationships are important so we can continue to grow as Christians and lead others to God. We as Christians are often looked at and judged by non believers based on actions of other Christians (good and bad).
My most recent class gathered last night to watch a movie and it was honestly like a group of friends hanging out. It changes the relationships because you become more than members of the same church. You really become friends who uplift, encourage, and inspire each other. Of course the first few nights of class everyone is learning each other, but slowly a community is forming.
If you are not a part of a Christian based community please become part of one. There are times in life that a Christian based community helps more than just a group of your friends. If you are having a test of faith, test in life, or marriage test the Christian community guides you in God's word rather than the world. Some times the world tells us things that go against God's word so we need the community there to lead us back to God.
I love my church! It encourages me to make those connections and maintain those connections. I have gained knowledge, friends, and support through these connections. The connections are a community based on God, a community of support, and a Christian community that improves my life.
Tuesday, March 3, 2015
The day God yelled at me.
Have you ever felt like God yelled at you? I did a few weeks ago, and it is not something I will ever forget.
As you know I lost my job at the end of 2014. I immediately had a peace about it, and knew God was planning something amazing for me. I knew I would be losing my job, and as others would ask what I was going to do I would say, "I don't know yet, God hasn't sent me a memo". This was my way to let them know I trust God, and I knew God was doing something for me.
However, a few weeks ago someone asked what is the hardest part of losing my job. Of course I could have said loss of friends, loss of direction, or loss of having a job in general. I already had peace with each of those because I had given it to God and knew something amazing was coming. Keep in mind I have worked since I was 16, worked while going to college full time to get my Bachelor's Degree, and really enjoyed the job that I had. I have never had to rely on my husband or anyone else because I would take care of it. I know rely is a crazy term to use when I refer to my husband, but I was raised that you work for what you have. I want to contribute and ensure Emma's future has open doors. I was also relying on employers, which is so hard for me. I had to rely on them to look over my resume', respond, and think I would be a fit for the job. I found that this would pull at any and all insecurities that you have. Instead of going into all of this I decided that my response would be that I have never had to rely on someone else to provide for me. Simple, right to the point, and innocent right?
WRONG! Immediately I heard God "so you don't rely on me?" Picture the dagger that pierced my heart and brought tears to my eyes Yes, I rely on God, but I didn't think of that in the same way. How can I trust God with everything, and not think that He would be in the middle of this whole process lining things up in my favor? I immediately got by myself because I needed to apologize to God. I had to tell Him that I do trust Him, and more importantly I am relying on Him to provide for me.
To think of the hurt on God's face when I said those hurtful words still brings tears to my eyes. Imagine your child telling you those same words. In the beginning of this whole process I asked God to take my anxiety, to take my hurt, to take my stress, and to take my worries. Guess what? He did without hesitation, and here I stood saying I had never had to rely on anyone.
God has blessed me so much through all of this. While I still do not have a job, I do have an amazing God, a indescribable sense of peace, and yet excitement for what is to come. During the past two months I have grown so much closer to God. I have asked God to show me the job He has planned for me, and I am trusting entirely. In the meantime, He is doing amazing things for me and growing my faith. He is putting opportunities in front of me that I never expected, and guiding me into amazing roles to expand His kingdom.
**Side note - while typing this God pointed out that I was really struggling with letting go of control. I have struggled with this so many times in the past, and I know being human I will continue to. I have to keep a check on myself in this area because God is in control of my life!
As you know I lost my job at the end of 2014. I immediately had a peace about it, and knew God was planning something amazing for me. I knew I would be losing my job, and as others would ask what I was going to do I would say, "I don't know yet, God hasn't sent me a memo". This was my way to let them know I trust God, and I knew God was doing something for me.
However, a few weeks ago someone asked what is the hardest part of losing my job. Of course I could have said loss of friends, loss of direction, or loss of having a job in general. I already had peace with each of those because I had given it to God and knew something amazing was coming. Keep in mind I have worked since I was 16, worked while going to college full time to get my Bachelor's Degree, and really enjoyed the job that I had. I have never had to rely on my husband or anyone else because I would take care of it. I know rely is a crazy term to use when I refer to my husband, but I was raised that you work for what you have. I want to contribute and ensure Emma's future has open doors. I was also relying on employers, which is so hard for me. I had to rely on them to look over my resume', respond, and think I would be a fit for the job. I found that this would pull at any and all insecurities that you have. Instead of going into all of this I decided that my response would be that I have never had to rely on someone else to provide for me. Simple, right to the point, and innocent right?
WRONG! Immediately I heard God "so you don't rely on me?" Picture the dagger that pierced my heart and brought tears to my eyes Yes, I rely on God, but I didn't think of that in the same way. How can I trust God with everything, and not think that He would be in the middle of this whole process lining things up in my favor? I immediately got by myself because I needed to apologize to God. I had to tell Him that I do trust Him, and more importantly I am relying on Him to provide for me.
To think of the hurt on God's face when I said those hurtful words still brings tears to my eyes. Imagine your child telling you those same words. In the beginning of this whole process I asked God to take my anxiety, to take my hurt, to take my stress, and to take my worries. Guess what? He did without hesitation, and here I stood saying I had never had to rely on anyone.
God has blessed me so much through all of this. While I still do not have a job, I do have an amazing God, a indescribable sense of peace, and yet excitement for what is to come. During the past two months I have grown so much closer to God. I have asked God to show me the job He has planned for me, and I am trusting entirely. In the meantime, He is doing amazing things for me and growing my faith. He is putting opportunities in front of me that I never expected, and guiding me into amazing roles to expand His kingdom.
**Side note - while typing this God pointed out that I was really struggling with letting go of control. I have struggled with this so many times in the past, and I know being human I will continue to. I have to keep a check on myself in this area because God is in control of my life!
Monday, March 2, 2015
Do you use your listening ears?
How may times do you tell your children we need them to use their listening ears? How often do you ask why someone doesn't listen to you? If you are like me, it is probably pretty often.
How often do you pray that God will lead you? How often do you pray for direction? How often do you ask God to tell you something? Again, if you are like me pretty often.
Do you ever think that maybe God is waiting for us to listen, and use our listening ears? I know for me I will ask for guidance, ask for answers, ask for God to tell me something then quickly go on to something else. When I get frustrated that I have not gotten an answer I have to realize that I never gave God a chance to answer. I was too busy asking and then going on with my agenda. I never stopped to hear what God wanted to tell me.
Lately, I have really worked on this, and I will be honest God has really opened my eyes! I am currently working with a friend on a project. I asked God the other night to show me what He wants this project to show/tell people. I cannot explain how I stood there in silence with a clear mind and God poured words into me. I felt as if he had been waiting for me to listen because the words kept coming. Afterwards I stood there in awe of what had just happened. I later asked Him to pour the words and goals on me again (this time so I could write them down) and again He did. I now have a sense of confidence, hope, joy, and encouragement that I am not sure I would have had if I hadn't listened.
I feel like God wants us to ask, but more than that He wants us to listen. Last night I was wide awake, and finally said "okay God what do you want me to hear tonight?" as I laid there watching Em sleep He poured into my heart again. This time it wasn't about the project but instead was about me. What He wanted me to know - how priceless is that?
I am not suggesting that this is easy, but it is oh so worth it. You may wonder where can you find the silence to listen. I will be honest the first pouring of words that I mentioned happened while I was in the shower, the next time was while I sat on my couch (but I had to make the effort by turning off the tv and any distractions), and then last night was while laying in Em's bed. Before an interview I asked God to show me what I needed to read. I sat in a parking lot opened my Bible and was led to passages that I needed. It talked about work, and doing your work for God not for man. How fitting of my day to hear that. I went into the interview knowing God was with me, and leading me.
In all honesty if you decide to completely listen, God will talk to you regardless of where you are. You may be in church, driving, or having a conversation with someone. All of those have happened to me. We just have to have our listening ears on!
I encourage you to make a time to sit and listen to God, you will be shocked by what you gain from it. If you are looking for guidance you may want to have a notebook handy to write all of it down. Let me know how turning your listening ears on changes your life!
How often do you pray that God will lead you? How often do you pray for direction? How often do you ask God to tell you something? Again, if you are like me pretty often.
Do you ever think that maybe God is waiting for us to listen, and use our listening ears? I know for me I will ask for guidance, ask for answers, ask for God to tell me something then quickly go on to something else. When I get frustrated that I have not gotten an answer I have to realize that I never gave God a chance to answer. I was too busy asking and then going on with my agenda. I never stopped to hear what God wanted to tell me.
Lately, I have really worked on this, and I will be honest God has really opened my eyes! I am currently working with a friend on a project. I asked God the other night to show me what He wants this project to show/tell people. I cannot explain how I stood there in silence with a clear mind and God poured words into me. I felt as if he had been waiting for me to listen because the words kept coming. Afterwards I stood there in awe of what had just happened. I later asked Him to pour the words and goals on me again (this time so I could write them down) and again He did. I now have a sense of confidence, hope, joy, and encouragement that I am not sure I would have had if I hadn't listened.
I feel like God wants us to ask, but more than that He wants us to listen. Last night I was wide awake, and finally said "okay God what do you want me to hear tonight?" as I laid there watching Em sleep He poured into my heart again. This time it wasn't about the project but instead was about me. What He wanted me to know - how priceless is that?
I am not suggesting that this is easy, but it is oh so worth it. You may wonder where can you find the silence to listen. I will be honest the first pouring of words that I mentioned happened while I was in the shower, the next time was while I sat on my couch (but I had to make the effort by turning off the tv and any distractions), and then last night was while laying in Em's bed. Before an interview I asked God to show me what I needed to read. I sat in a parking lot opened my Bible and was led to passages that I needed. It talked about work, and doing your work for God not for man. How fitting of my day to hear that. I went into the interview knowing God was with me, and leading me.
In all honesty if you decide to completely listen, God will talk to you regardless of where you are. You may be in church, driving, or having a conversation with someone. All of those have happened to me. We just have to have our listening ears on!
I encourage you to make a time to sit and listen to God, you will be shocked by what you gain from it. If you are looking for guidance you may want to have a notebook handy to write all of it down. Let me know how turning your listening ears on changes your life!
Tuesday, February 24, 2015
Who angers you?
Do you find yourself getting angry with or at someone? Do you begin to think or say things that you typically wouldn't? Is this person a family member, neighbor, coworker, boss, friend, or someone you have never met?
You make not think much about it, but that anger runs so much deeper than you think. The definition of anger is "a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, or hostility" so then we need to look at annoyance, displeasure, and hostility. However, when you look up annoyance it speaks of anger, displeasure speaks of anger, but hostility speaks of unfriendliness. Often if you are angry at someone you then begin talking about them, and the snowball begins. You get angry, tell someone else, and continue to spread the anger by telling others or talking about the person, then before you know it that first seed of anger has spread.
I too have fallen subject to anger. I held in anger towards relatives and others in my life. There are times that I still feel myself getting angry, but I have to let it go. I realized years ago that if you allow someone to make you angry and stay angry then they control you. I realized that I have to forgive the person, for myself not them I have the ability to choose how I react to the person. I can get angry and give them power, or give it to God and give all of the power to Him. I am not implying that I never get angry, but I am a lot faster to let it go now.
Now lets see what God says about anger:
Ecclesiates 7:9 - Control your temper for anger labels you a fool
Ephesians 4:27 - for anger fives a foothold to the devil
James 1:20 - Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires
That puts a different spin on things doesn't it? We may think it isn't hurting anyone, but in reality it is hurting God and that is someone I never want to hurt. How can we change this? People will continue to upset you, and possibly anger you. However, you and you alone have the choice of how to react. You can react in peace, in forgiveness, and in love or you can continue the anger seeds.
Is there someone that comes to mind when you read all of this? Imagine the relief you will feel when you forgive them. You do not have to reconcile the relationship, or allow them back in your in your life. No one deserves to be in an unhealthy relationship, or to be harmed but everyone does deserve to live in peace. Once you forgive the person the peace will begin.
Take a moment and think of who angers you, so that you can begin taking the steps necessary to claim the control of your life back. Just because you address this today doesn't mean that you will never be angered again. However, it does mean that next time you will be better equipped to respond and retain the control.
You make not think much about it, but that anger runs so much deeper than you think. The definition of anger is "a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, or hostility" so then we need to look at annoyance, displeasure, and hostility. However, when you look up annoyance it speaks of anger, displeasure speaks of anger, but hostility speaks of unfriendliness. Often if you are angry at someone you then begin talking about them, and the snowball begins. You get angry, tell someone else, and continue to spread the anger by telling others or talking about the person, then before you know it that first seed of anger has spread.
I too have fallen subject to anger. I held in anger towards relatives and others in my life. There are times that I still feel myself getting angry, but I have to let it go. I realized years ago that if you allow someone to make you angry and stay angry then they control you. I realized that I have to forgive the person, for myself not them I have the ability to choose how I react to the person. I can get angry and give them power, or give it to God and give all of the power to Him. I am not implying that I never get angry, but I am a lot faster to let it go now.
Now lets see what God says about anger:
Ecclesiates 7:9 - Control your temper for anger labels you a fool
Ephesians 4:27 - for anger fives a foothold to the devil
James 1:20 - Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires
That puts a different spin on things doesn't it? We may think it isn't hurting anyone, but in reality it is hurting God and that is someone I never want to hurt. How can we change this? People will continue to upset you, and possibly anger you. However, you and you alone have the choice of how to react. You can react in peace, in forgiveness, and in love or you can continue the anger seeds.
Is there someone that comes to mind when you read all of this? Imagine the relief you will feel when you forgive them. You do not have to reconcile the relationship, or allow them back in your in your life. No one deserves to be in an unhealthy relationship, or to be harmed but everyone does deserve to live in peace. Once you forgive the person the peace will begin.
Take a moment and think of who angers you, so that you can begin taking the steps necessary to claim the control of your life back. Just because you address this today doesn't mean that you will never be angered again. However, it does mean that next time you will be better equipped to respond and retain the control.
Wednesday, February 18, 2015
Snow day
So Monday afternoon we began getting snow. While I love snow I hate the fact that more often than not my husband will end up having to work. Every year when I get excited about snow he will just puff. Well Monday was no different, he was able to come home early but was waiting to be called back in. The phone rang about 12:30 am and off to scrap the roads he went. Daycare was closed so Emma and I played until Steve came home around lunch time. Emma loves the snow like I do so we made a few trips out to play in the snow. Of course the trips were short since we didn't want her to get too cold or too sick.
I know a lot of people do not like snow, but for me it is such a peaceful time. You can walk outside and it is silent, glistening, and blanketed in white. The snow coats and covers everything, and I see it as another masterpiece by God. Each individual snowflake, coming together, and making everything the same (white). Isn't that like God's love for us? We are each an individual then cleaned of our sin, and come together as His children. We are all covered in His peaceful, glistening, and perfect love. We have people come into our lives and they may bring sin with them. This creates footprints in our perfect covering. So our perfection is tempted, molded, and shaped by the world. We have wonderful people leading us to God, they are like the weathermen telling us that the snow is coming. Once we accept God's love we are cleaned white as snow by the blood that Jesus shed. While our world is now perfect, covered in white, glistening, and peaceful we still have the rest of the world around us. We may have a past of people telling us that God isn't good, and they can be seen as spreading the brine. They are hoping that God's word doesn't stick in our lives. We have people who try to tell us we aren't good enough they can be seen as the snow plow. They try to take everything away that God has promised as if we never experienced the peaceful covering of love. We have people tell us that no one loves us and plants the seeds of doubt, they are the salt spreaders. The longer we dwell on it the more it eats away at our covering. We have the people who pretend to be our friends, pretend to be Christians, and in the end we slip up in their world, like black ice. These are often as dangerous as black ice because we never see it coming until we have fallen.
Even after all of this guess what there is good news. We still have the weathermen telling us that the snow is coming. Even after the snowplow, the salt, the black ice, and the footprints in our snow we can turn to God and be covered in peace again. We can tell others how God has saved us, and share the peace with them.
I know a lot of people do not like snow, but for me it is such a peaceful time. You can walk outside and it is silent, glistening, and blanketed in white. The snow coats and covers everything, and I see it as another masterpiece by God. Each individual snowflake, coming together, and making everything the same (white). Isn't that like God's love for us? We are each an individual then cleaned of our sin, and come together as His children. We are all covered in His peaceful, glistening, and perfect love. We have people come into our lives and they may bring sin with them. This creates footprints in our perfect covering. So our perfection is tempted, molded, and shaped by the world. We have wonderful people leading us to God, they are like the weathermen telling us that the snow is coming. Once we accept God's love we are cleaned white as snow by the blood that Jesus shed. While our world is now perfect, covered in white, glistening, and peaceful we still have the rest of the world around us. We may have a past of people telling us that God isn't good, and they can be seen as spreading the brine. They are hoping that God's word doesn't stick in our lives. We have people who try to tell us we aren't good enough they can be seen as the snow plow. They try to take everything away that God has promised as if we never experienced the peaceful covering of love. We have people tell us that no one loves us and plants the seeds of doubt, they are the salt spreaders. The longer we dwell on it the more it eats away at our covering. We have the people who pretend to be our friends, pretend to be Christians, and in the end we slip up in their world, like black ice. These are often as dangerous as black ice because we never see it coming until we have fallen.
Even after all of this guess what there is good news. We still have the weathermen telling us that the snow is coming. Even after the snowplow, the salt, the black ice, and the footprints in our snow we can turn to God and be covered in peace again. We can tell others how God has saved us, and share the peace with them.
We can't just look at others we have to look at ourselves as well. Have you been the weatherman, the snowplow, salt, or the black ice to people around you? We can spread the peace of knowing God instead of being a snowplow, salt, or black ice in their lives.
Can you identify people in your life that represent the weathermen, snowplows, salt, or black ice? How can you change this, and how can you change your role in the lives of others?
In all areas- enjoy playing in the snow!!
Friday, February 13, 2015
Valentine's Day
So tomorrow is Valentine's Day have you finished your shopping? Were the school party items taken care of, what about gifts for your children and spouse? Are you waiting for candy, flowers, a nice dinner, jewelry, or maybe a trip somewhere from your significant other?
You have been rushing to make sure everything is perfect, but have you taken a moment to thank God for His love? Your significant other may show up with flower, candy, dinner reservations, and a surprise trip. however, your significant other can never top God's gift for you. God is promising a life of love, joy, mercy, grace, forgiveness, and eternity with Him. That gift for you is far more valuable than all of the candy, flowers, and gifts in the world.
Want to know something else? God's gift for you is everyday not just a date on the calendar. God knew you and loved you before you met your parents, before you met your spouse, before you met your children How awesome is His love! It is all day every day. When your spouse gets mad at you, God is still there, when you break up with your boyfriend God is there, when your children are doing their own thing on Valentine's Day God is there.
I challenge you to take a moment with your Valentine, but do not forget to spend time with God. You don't have to make a reservation, you don't have to order anything, and you don't have to purchase anything. God has already paid the price - just thank Him and spend time with him.
You have been rushing to make sure everything is perfect, but have you taken a moment to thank God for His love? Your significant other may show up with flower, candy, dinner reservations, and a surprise trip. however, your significant other can never top God's gift for you. God is promising a life of love, joy, mercy, grace, forgiveness, and eternity with Him. That gift for you is far more valuable than all of the candy, flowers, and gifts in the world.
Want to know something else? God's gift for you is everyday not just a date on the calendar. God knew you and loved you before you met your parents, before you met your spouse, before you met your children How awesome is His love! It is all day every day. When your spouse gets mad at you, God is still there, when you break up with your boyfriend God is there, when your children are doing their own thing on Valentine's Day God is there.
I challenge you to take a moment with your Valentine, but do not forget to spend time with God. You don't have to make a reservation, you don't have to order anything, and you don't have to purchase anything. God has already paid the price - just thank Him and spend time with him.
Wednesday, February 11, 2015
My wish for you...
I have always loved music, and a lot of times a song can express things that can't easily be expressed in words. Songs are powerful in that they can take you back in time, remind you of a specific person, and flood your emotions. Most people can remember a song from a date, prom, wedding, first dance, etc. However you can also have songs that stick out in your mind because of a place you are in life. Songs can also cross the music genre when you listen to the words. Steve often laughs because I will say did you know the song said that, and he only listens to the beat of the song. However, he is also quick to point out when I get the words wrong. It has caused me to google lyrics before thinking I was going to prove him wrong, only to realize I had been singing it wrong for years (or maybe the artist has been singing it wrong because my lyrics made sense).
So one song that really spoke to me the other day is a country genre song, but hit me so hard as a Daughter of Christ. You may know the Rascal Flatts song "My wish for you", and this song really makes me think of things I want for Emma. Lets take a moment to look at the lyrics:
"My Wish" by Rascal Flatts
I hope that the days come easy and the moments pass slow,
And each road leads you where you want to go,
And if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
And if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,
If it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile,
But more than anything, more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
I hope you never look back, but ya never forget,
All the ones who love you, in the place you left,
I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,
And you help somebody every chance you get,
Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,
And you always give more than you take.
But more than anything, yeah, and more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
This is my wish
I hope you know somebody loves you
May all your dreams stay big
So one song that really spoke to me the other day is a country genre song, but hit me so hard as a Daughter of Christ. You may know the Rascal Flatts song "My wish for you", and this song really makes me think of things I want for Emma. Lets take a moment to look at the lyrics:
"My Wish" by Rascal Flatts
I hope that the days come easy and the moments pass slow,
And each road leads you where you want to go,
And if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
And if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,
If it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile,
But more than anything, more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
I hope you never look back, but ya never forget,
All the ones who love you, in the place you left,
I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,
And you help somebody every chance you get,
Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,
And you always give more than you take.
But more than anything, yeah, and more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
This is my wish
I hope you know somebody loves you
May all your dreams stay big
This song is like my prayer for Emma. I want her dreams to stay big even if she just failed at something, I want her to warm the world with her smile regardless of how cold the world seems, I want her to know someone loves her even when she doesn't feel loved. Who or what does this song make you think of? Do you wish these things for your family, friends, children, or coworkers?
Now read the lyrics again from from God's view - His wishes for your life! Now keep in mind that He knew you before you were born, He knows what today and tomorrow holds, and He has a plan for you. Do you trust Him to know the better path for you to take or do you hope He approves of the path you take? When faced with the closed door do you try to force it open, or keep walking to find the open window? You do not have to carry more than you can hold when you give it to God. He takes the burden, He takes the pain, He takes the hurt, and most of all He takes you into His loving arms. If we have these wishes for our children then why would God not have the same wishes for us? He does, we just have to trust Him with it.
Monday, February 2, 2015
Where do you turn?
When you are having a bad day where do you turn? Do you turn to a friend, to your spouse, to food, to alcohol, to drugs, or something else?
Maybe you have a rough morning. you have to get up get the kids ready for school, get yourself ready for work, get everyone fed, and get them to school and yourself to work on time. Your child doesn't want to cooperate, and before you know it you have yelled at your child, and you are now running late. Do you yell at your child for making you run late? Well you finally make it out of the door, only to get behind the slowest driver on the road that day. What does your child hear you say about the other driver? Everyone gets to school and work safely but how has your day started? It isn't even 8:00 and what has your child heard you say about them, about yourself, about the other people on the road? Right now you may feel terrible because you realized just how quickly your day can go from God to evil.
Now where do you turn? Do you continue the bad day, and give the entire day to evil? So then when you get home that evening your child (remember the one who you yelled at this morning because they were making you late) needs help with homework. How do you respond? Chances are that you will not respond with love. By this time you had a rough morning, so I am sure your day at work didn't improve, and now when you want to get home and relax you have others that need you. Your child and spouse may try to do everything right, but it is too late evil has already won you for the day. you may snap at them, yell at them, say things you would never think to say to them, and hurt them more than you realize. By the time you go to bed you may have hurt your child, your spouse, your coworkers, and everyone around you. What are you showing your world about yourself and about God? Are you showing them love, grace, mercy, compassion, or anger, yelling, hurtful words, frustration? How often are your days like this?
Maybe it isn't just a bad day but a bad week, month or year. Where do you turn? How different would your day have been if you had turned to God at the first stressful moment? Imagine if when your child didn't want to cooperate you turned to God. How differently would your entire day have gone?
It is very easy to let the day go to evil, if you do not equip yourself with God! I started a Blessing Jar last year, and it has become my go to place. A stressful moment and I pull out a scripture and if need be I will post it somewhere for me to see the rest of the day. You can write your own reminders, scriptures that speak to you, or look online. Then all you have to do is place them in a jar, basket, or container of your choice. Place it somewhere that you will see it. Maybe you need one at home and at work, or maybe you just need one that you take with you. When you feel satan trying to take your day, pull out a Blessing and give the day to God. The Blessings are yours so own them! They can be about God in general, about marriage, children, struggle, work, or anything that you find yourself dealing with.
To help get you started I am putting some Blessings below that I found on Pinterest.
Let me know if you start a Blessing Jar, and how it changes your days!
Maybe you have a rough morning. you have to get up get the kids ready for school, get yourself ready for work, get everyone fed, and get them to school and yourself to work on time. Your child doesn't want to cooperate, and before you know it you have yelled at your child, and you are now running late. Do you yell at your child for making you run late? Well you finally make it out of the door, only to get behind the slowest driver on the road that day. What does your child hear you say about the other driver? Everyone gets to school and work safely but how has your day started? It isn't even 8:00 and what has your child heard you say about them, about yourself, about the other people on the road? Right now you may feel terrible because you realized just how quickly your day can go from God to evil.
Now where do you turn? Do you continue the bad day, and give the entire day to evil? So then when you get home that evening your child (remember the one who you yelled at this morning because they were making you late) needs help with homework. How do you respond? Chances are that you will not respond with love. By this time you had a rough morning, so I am sure your day at work didn't improve, and now when you want to get home and relax you have others that need you. Your child and spouse may try to do everything right, but it is too late evil has already won you for the day. you may snap at them, yell at them, say things you would never think to say to them, and hurt them more than you realize. By the time you go to bed you may have hurt your child, your spouse, your coworkers, and everyone around you. What are you showing your world about yourself and about God? Are you showing them love, grace, mercy, compassion, or anger, yelling, hurtful words, frustration? How often are your days like this?
Maybe it isn't just a bad day but a bad week, month or year. Where do you turn? How different would your day have been if you had turned to God at the first stressful moment? Imagine if when your child didn't want to cooperate you turned to God. How differently would your entire day have gone?
It is very easy to let the day go to evil, if you do not equip yourself with God! I started a Blessing Jar last year, and it has become my go to place. A stressful moment and I pull out a scripture and if need be I will post it somewhere for me to see the rest of the day. You can write your own reminders, scriptures that speak to you, or look online. Then all you have to do is place them in a jar, basket, or container of your choice. Place it somewhere that you will see it. Maybe you need one at home and at work, or maybe you just need one that you take with you. When you feel satan trying to take your day, pull out a Blessing and give the day to God. The Blessings are yours so own them! They can be about God in general, about marriage, children, struggle, work, or anything that you find yourself dealing with.
To help get you started I am putting some Blessings below that I found on Pinterest.
Let me know if you start a Blessing Jar, and how it changes your days!
Friday, January 30, 2015
God working
Have you seen God working lately? Was He working on you or through you? Can you look back on a time in your life and realize that God was in fact working?
There have been so many times in my life that I later looked back and realized that God was in fact working either for me or through me. On Sunday we had an amazing speaker Dr. Samuel Thomas of Hope Givers. If you have never heard him please google him and find out what all amazing things he does. Some of the things that stuck with me were all of the children he has brought in and taken care of as well as all of the burnt women he has taken in. The orphans come to know God through Dr. Thomas and his organization. The burnt women no longer fear being set on fire, but instead learn that they can spend eternity with God. How amazing of a man to run this organization. Oh and he has had 20 attempted assignations on his life. Really, we worry about the smallest craziest thing and this man has people trying to kill him because he is showing God's love. I sat there feeling like I am not doing enough for God. Please keep Dr. Samuel Thomas in your prayers as his government has said that his organization is their target to shut down.
On Wednesday I had an interview and felt God working on me before the interview. I had some spare time, so I went to a parking lot to work on my Beautiful Mess Bible Study, and then just asked God to lead me to what He wanted me to read and know. I flipped in my Bible to Ecclesiastes 2 and my eyes went directly to 2:8. I ended up reading all of the way through Ecclesiastes 2:8. It spoke directly to my heart and was exactly what I needed to hear/read. I finished reading, prayed, and headed to my interview. I walked in without any stress, any anxiety, and knew that God was right there with me.
That night I went to my Beautiful Mess class, and again felt God wanting me to do more. As my amazing leader was speaking of her trip to Africa last week she spoke about some women that she met with. These women were Muslims, but allowed her to share God with them. There were great examples of how God was also on the trip and showing His love. As class went on I felt drawn to do something for these women. I suggested that our class "adopt" that group of women, and send them ideas that they may not ordinarily be able to get. The women in the class supported the idea, and now we are praying to see how God wants us to show them His love. Please be in prayer for us to know what to send these women.
How is God working in your life right now? Are you asking Him to work through you?
There have been so many times in my life that I later looked back and realized that God was in fact working either for me or through me. On Sunday we had an amazing speaker Dr. Samuel Thomas of Hope Givers. If you have never heard him please google him and find out what all amazing things he does. Some of the things that stuck with me were all of the children he has brought in and taken care of as well as all of the burnt women he has taken in. The orphans come to know God through Dr. Thomas and his organization. The burnt women no longer fear being set on fire, but instead learn that they can spend eternity with God. How amazing of a man to run this organization. Oh and he has had 20 attempted assignations on his life. Really, we worry about the smallest craziest thing and this man has people trying to kill him because he is showing God's love. I sat there feeling like I am not doing enough for God. Please keep Dr. Samuel Thomas in your prayers as his government has said that his organization is their target to shut down.
On Wednesday I had an interview and felt God working on me before the interview. I had some spare time, so I went to a parking lot to work on my Beautiful Mess Bible Study, and then just asked God to lead me to what He wanted me to read and know. I flipped in my Bible to Ecclesiastes 2 and my eyes went directly to 2:8. I ended up reading all of the way through Ecclesiastes 2:8. It spoke directly to my heart and was exactly what I needed to hear/read. I finished reading, prayed, and headed to my interview. I walked in without any stress, any anxiety, and knew that God was right there with me.
That night I went to my Beautiful Mess class, and again felt God wanting me to do more. As my amazing leader was speaking of her trip to Africa last week she spoke about some women that she met with. These women were Muslims, but allowed her to share God with them. There were great examples of how God was also on the trip and showing His love. As class went on I felt drawn to do something for these women. I suggested that our class "adopt" that group of women, and send them ideas that they may not ordinarily be able to get. The women in the class supported the idea, and now we are praying to see how God wants us to show them His love. Please be in prayer for us to know what to send these women.
How is God working in your life right now? Are you asking Him to work through you?
Tuesday, January 27, 2015
"But God"
So I had been out running errands. As I headed home, I stopped at an intersection and noticed the car across from me had a tag on the front that said "But God".
How often does God tell us something and our response is "but God"? Now I do not know the person driving the car or their meaning behind the tag, but I could only think of when we question God. I could question God about why I lost my job, why I haven't found a job, etc. However, at the end of the day I should never say "but God". God has told me before to speak to someone or to handle a situation a certain way and I will be honest I have said "but God". How many times have you felt God leading you a certain direction and you hesitated, you questioned the direction, or maybe you just pushed that feeling away? That was you saying "but God".
This view may say or think some of the following:
"But God"
- doesn't love me
- put me here
- left me
- let this happen to me
- took my loved one
- doesn't care
- doesn't hear me
Now of course there can be two views to this tag. I do not know that the driver questions God. Maybe instead it was an answer to a problem. When we are faced with a hard situation we can say "but God" as in "but God has the answer". Maybe we do not have the solution, but God does. Have you been faced with a decision and while you did not know which way to turn you were able to say "but God does". Maybe the doctor said they can't cure your illness, "but God can". Maybe you have been in an abusive relationship and have been told that no one loves you, "but God does". We can either turn to God or trust God.
This view may say or think some of the following:
"But God"
- loves me
- uplifts me
- cares for me
- wants the best for me
- shields me
- has mercy on me
- has given me more than I ever deserved
As with the tag on the car, it is all about perspective and how we CHOOSE to see things. We can see an ending as exactly that, or a new beginning. We can have faith that God has us, or we can doubt His love for us. In life we often see "but God" as our response to God, not our response to the world about God. My God loves me, cares for me, uplifts me, holds me in His right hand, and only wants the best for me. So the next time I am faced with a situation I CHOOSE to trust His plan for me over my plan for myself. He knows what the future holds and what the plan is for my life.
Which view of "but God" do you have, and does that change based on your life circumstance?
How often does God tell us something and our response is "but God"? Now I do not know the person driving the car or their meaning behind the tag, but I could only think of when we question God. I could question God about why I lost my job, why I haven't found a job, etc. However, at the end of the day I should never say "but God". God has told me before to speak to someone or to handle a situation a certain way and I will be honest I have said "but God". How many times have you felt God leading you a certain direction and you hesitated, you questioned the direction, or maybe you just pushed that feeling away? That was you saying "but God".
This view may say or think some of the following:
"But God"
- doesn't love me
- put me here
- left me
- let this happen to me
- took my loved one
- doesn't care
- doesn't hear me
Now of course there can be two views to this tag. I do not know that the driver questions God. Maybe instead it was an answer to a problem. When we are faced with a hard situation we can say "but God" as in "but God has the answer". Maybe we do not have the solution, but God does. Have you been faced with a decision and while you did not know which way to turn you were able to say "but God does". Maybe the doctor said they can't cure your illness, "but God can". Maybe you have been in an abusive relationship and have been told that no one loves you, "but God does". We can either turn to God or trust God.
This view may say or think some of the following:
"But God"
- loves me
- uplifts me
- cares for me
- wants the best for me
- shields me
- has mercy on me
- has given me more than I ever deserved
As with the tag on the car, it is all about perspective and how we CHOOSE to see things. We can see an ending as exactly that, or a new beginning. We can have faith that God has us, or we can doubt His love for us. In life we often see "but God" as our response to God, not our response to the world about God. My God loves me, cares for me, uplifts me, holds me in His right hand, and only wants the best for me. So the next time I am faced with a situation I CHOOSE to trust His plan for me over my plan for myself. He knows what the future holds and what the plan is for my life.
Which view of "but God" do you have, and does that change based on your life circumstance?
Thursday, January 22, 2015
How would you describe yourself?
Take a moment and describe yourself. If you were talking to someone who had never met you how would you describe yourself? Calm, energetic, clown, full of life, organized, unorganized, optimistic, tall, short, average, fat, skinny, pretty, ugly, not good enough, fun, or any other way you would describe yourself.
Now think of why you labeled yourself with those words. Is it something you have dealt with for years, how you see yourself compared to others, or have you been told that you are that way? We often describe ourselves based on how the world tells us to. However, that is not an accurate description because you are a child of God.
"How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!" (1 John 3:1, NIV)
We need to look at how God sees us. Keep in mind that God sent His son to die for us, so how He sees us is way more important than how the world sees us.
Do you describe yourself based on your sin? (broken, dirty, useless, unworthy, etc) Maybe you had a bad experience in life and feel that it defines who you are. Maybe you have struggled with a sin, and can't forgive yourself for choices that you made. God has forgiven you, and you need to forgive yourself. I have made bad choices and bad decisions in the past, but if I confess my sin and God can forgive me then I should be able to forgive myself.
"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:9 NIV)
Do you describe yourself based on the world, and how others may see you? (tall, skinny, pretty, fat, ugly, etc) We need to look to God not to man. Man will let you down time and time again but God will not.
"In God I trust and am not afraid. What can man do to me?" (Psalm 56:11 NIV)
Do you describe yourself based on what others have? (poor, jobless, childless, etc) Please do not miss God and your life by wanting what others have. God has a plan for you and your life. The plan that God has for you is specific to you, and trust that the plan is what is best for you.
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future".(Jeremiah 29:11 NIV)
Now look back at your list and mark through all of the labels that the world has put on you. You are made new with God!
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!" (2 Corinthians 5:17 NIV)
Isn't that great news? We do not have to worry about our past, God cleaned the slate when he sent His son to die for us. Imagine the amount of love that God has for us that He could send His own child to die for us. Now as you read the Bible and grow closer to God you can see new ways to describe yourself - through God's eyes.
Tuesday, January 20, 2015
God is where you are
I am participating in a class at church on Beautiful Mess Motherhood for Every Moment. It has been such a blessing and we are only on week two! This class was perfect timing for me.
One thing that stuck out to me is that God is where you are. How often have we been in a bad spot and wondered where God was? We often feel that God has left us during difficult times, but He is always there with us. He may be guiding our steps, showing us something we need to learn about ourselves, or possibly waiting for us to simply turn to Him. He wants to handle our bad moments just as much as He should be praised during our high moments. He isn't just tree when we are floating on clouds but He is also there when we are at our lowest.
During my journey with infertility I realized that God not only wanted me to learn things about myself but he also wanted me to turn to Him and trust Him with what I was experiencing. He didn't just want to be there for the positive pregnacy test, but He was there for all of the negative pregnancy tests as well.
With the loss of my Dad God was right there with me as well. He was talking to me, making me move when I didn't want to, and changing my heart. He wasn't just there when my Dad told me that he loved me but He was also there when my dad got upset with me. He was there trough the whole relationship: the good, the bad, and the ugly.
Are you acknowledging God when He is with you all of the time or just during the high points? Are you turning to Him during low points? Most of all are you trusting Him trough all of the lows, middles, and highs?
Thursday, January 15, 2015
Jesus loves me!
When I lost my job I told everyone that I would not start to stress until the middle of this month. I took on the approach that finding a job was now my job. My husband laughed and said that he would wait until the end of the month before he started stressing.
Yesterday on the way to daycare I ran across 3 patches of ice, so decided it was safer to come back home. We played with toys, read books, danced, and made fake snow. Finally it was nap time, she was tired and so was I. She wanted me to cuddle her, which of course I didn't hesitate. She asked me to sing to her, and when I asked what song she was quick to respond "Jesus loves me". As I began singing she joined in. I felt as if God knew that was the exact song I not only needed to sing at the moment, but I also needed to hear.
So today is the 15th, the middle of the month. I have taken the steps to get insurance coverage, I have submitted my claim for unemployment, and have submitted many applications and resumes. While I still do not have a job, I do have a peace. I have the peace that God loves me, and He is working for me. I am not going to say that there haven't been moments of stress and panic, in fact I had two of those moments this morning. However, I have a peace knowing that God is working to open a door to an amazing opportunity. I may not know what this opportunity is yet, but I know it is going to be amazing. Am I going to stress - no. Am I going to panic - I hope not. Am I going to stop looking for a job - no. Am I going to trust that something amazing is coming - YES!
While God is working for me I still have to do my end of the work too. I can't just sit back and say God has this, and not do the work I need to do. I can't wait for the job to find me. I can't wait for the opportunity to find me. I have to do my end of it as well. Giving the problem to God doesn't mean that our work is finished. Sometimes giving the problem to God ends up putting more work on us because God shows us things that we need to do. God works for us, but we have to work for ourselves as well. God can send us the perfect opportunity but if we do not do the work to maintain it, then we will lose it.
While I am waiting for the blessing, I am also working for the blessing. I am looking at myself, my work ethic, my budget, my relationship with God, and how I need to improve myself. Have you ever found that when you give a problem to God He shows you things that you need to work on as well?
Tuesday, January 13, 2015
A time for everything
I started this post with one direction, but God led me in a different direction. I was led to the following scripture.
Ecclesiates 3: 1-8
While I am still trying to find the reason God led me to this scripture, I realize that right now I am going through a a season of life that I know God is blessing me through. Through this I am being shown who I am, and who the people around me are. Looking back at the descriptions in the scripture I have been hurt, scattered, searching, and torn in the past couple of months. God has blessed me with some wonderful people and experiences through this season. I am being encouraged by some of the most amazing friends, and it amazes me how much I learn about myself when I look at my friends. I have friends who will uplift me, friends who will encourage me, and friends who are helping me through this season. I think God is telling me that this is just a season, and it will come to an end. In the past few months I have lost my dad, lost my job, but I never lost God! I never try to focus on the negative, so in the past few months I have gained peace regarding my relationship with my dad, gained an understanding of God having a bigger and better plan for me, and gained knowledge of myself. I have had to look at things about myself that I haven't looked at in a long time. I was in a place of comfort in life - comfort in my job, comfort in my friendships, comfort in what I was doing. However, God wanted me to do more. Reach more people for Him through my job, have Christian healthy meaningful friendships, and do more in life. I have began taking a class at church regarding parenting to improve how I see myself as a parent. I have applied for jobs that are completely out of my comfort zone, but I felt like that was what I needed. I have focused more on my relationship with God and praising Him for all of the blessings in my life. I could sit here and dwell on the things lost, but oh so much more has been gained.
Again, I may look back this afternoon and see that God was leading me to this scripture for a completely different reason. However, I now see how this trial I am going through is just a season, and as we all know seasons come to an end.
Ecclesiates 3: 1-8
A Time for Everything
1For everything there is a season,
a time for every activity under heaven.
2A time to be born and a time to die.
A time to plant and a time to harvest.
3A time to kill and a time to heal.
A time to tear down and a time to build up.
4A time to cry and a time to laugh.
A time to grieve and a time to dance.
5A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.
A time to embrace and a time to turn away.
6A time to search and a time to quit searching.
A time to keep and a time to throw away.
7A time to tear and a time to mend.
A time to be quiet and a time to speak.
8A time to love and a time to hate.
A time for war and a time for peace.
While I am still trying to find the reason God led me to this scripture, I realize that right now I am going through a a season of life that I know God is blessing me through. Through this I am being shown who I am, and who the people around me are. Looking back at the descriptions in the scripture I have been hurt, scattered, searching, and torn in the past couple of months. God has blessed me with some wonderful people and experiences through this season. I am being encouraged by some of the most amazing friends, and it amazes me how much I learn about myself when I look at my friends. I have friends who will uplift me, friends who will encourage me, and friends who are helping me through this season. I think God is telling me that this is just a season, and it will come to an end. In the past few months I have lost my dad, lost my job, but I never lost God! I never try to focus on the negative, so in the past few months I have gained peace regarding my relationship with my dad, gained an understanding of God having a bigger and better plan for me, and gained knowledge of myself. I have had to look at things about myself that I haven't looked at in a long time. I was in a place of comfort in life - comfort in my job, comfort in my friendships, comfort in what I was doing. However, God wanted me to do more. Reach more people for Him through my job, have Christian healthy meaningful friendships, and do more in life. I have began taking a class at church regarding parenting to improve how I see myself as a parent. I have applied for jobs that are completely out of my comfort zone, but I felt like that was what I needed. I have focused more on my relationship with God and praising Him for all of the blessings in my life. I could sit here and dwell on the things lost, but oh so much more has been gained.
Again, I may look back this afternoon and see that God was leading me to this scripture for a completely different reason. However, I now see how this trial I am going through is just a season, and as we all know seasons come to an end.
Monday, January 12, 2015
Life verse
Have you ever picked a verse, memorized it, and focused on it for a difficult time in life? I had not done this prior to dealing with infertility. During the infertility journey, I can't even remember how, but I came across Proverbs 3:5 "Trust the Lord with all your heart, do not lean on your own understanding". Wow what a verse to step on my toes.
Did you notice that it doesn't say trust your coworker, your boss, your spouse, your doctor, your neighbor, or even your parents? It says trust the LORD! How often do we put our trust in man? And how often does man let us down? Now think about when the Lord let you down... still thinking aren't you.
Moving on from that it says with ALL your heart. Not part of it, not a 1/4 of it but ALL of it. This becomes hard if our trust isn't in the Lord. If we trust man then we think man will pull us out of the situation, so the Lord only gets part of our trust. In the end we are let down, broken, and hurt by man and turn back to the Lord. Why did we ever turn to man over the Lord? We put our trust in someone else then find ourselves back in the same position.
Why do you think it says not to lean on own understanding? I think it is because our mind will lead us down a path we don't need to go down. For example, during infertility my mind went to I did something wrong, I don't deserve a child, and all of these reasons that I wasn't getting pregnant. Maybe it just wasn't the right timing? Instead of waiting on God's timing I was trying to make it my own. Look where my understanding got me. Upset, wondering what I did wrong, wondering why I was being punished, and looking around at pregnant women wondering why they could have a child and I couldn't. This past weekend would have been my cousin's birthday, but we lost her to cancer when she was 20 years old. We do not know why, but I know that God had a plan for her and her life. There are a lot of things in life that we will not understand, but God has a reason for it.
I believe that God lead me to this verse so that I would realize that He had it ALL under control. Since that experience this has become my life verse. I have it written, posted, embroidered, and most of all repeat it to myself very often. It seems to be valuable for all aspects of life. I am often praying this verse, even today because I do not want to put the world before God.
What is your life verse? Why does this verse fit you, and what lead you to this verse? If you do not have a life verse I encourage you to get one.
Did you notice that it doesn't say trust your coworker, your boss, your spouse, your doctor, your neighbor, or even your parents? It says trust the LORD! How often do we put our trust in man? And how often does man let us down? Now think about when the Lord let you down... still thinking aren't you.
Moving on from that it says with ALL your heart. Not part of it, not a 1/4 of it but ALL of it. This becomes hard if our trust isn't in the Lord. If we trust man then we think man will pull us out of the situation, so the Lord only gets part of our trust. In the end we are let down, broken, and hurt by man and turn back to the Lord. Why did we ever turn to man over the Lord? We put our trust in someone else then find ourselves back in the same position.
Why do you think it says not to lean on own understanding? I think it is because our mind will lead us down a path we don't need to go down. For example, during infertility my mind went to I did something wrong, I don't deserve a child, and all of these reasons that I wasn't getting pregnant. Maybe it just wasn't the right timing? Instead of waiting on God's timing I was trying to make it my own. Look where my understanding got me. Upset, wondering what I did wrong, wondering why I was being punished, and looking around at pregnant women wondering why they could have a child and I couldn't. This past weekend would have been my cousin's birthday, but we lost her to cancer when she was 20 years old. We do not know why, but I know that God had a plan for her and her life. There are a lot of things in life that we will not understand, but God has a reason for it.
I believe that God lead me to this verse so that I would realize that He had it ALL under control. Since that experience this has become my life verse. I have it written, posted, embroidered, and most of all repeat it to myself very often. It seems to be valuable for all aspects of life. I am often praying this verse, even today because I do not want to put the world before God.
What is your life verse? Why does this verse fit you, and what lead you to this verse? If you do not have a life verse I encourage you to get one.
Friday, January 9, 2015
How God blessed me through my Daddy
I just wanted to thank you for all of the kind words, thoughts, and prayers as my family lost my Dad. It was one of the hardest things that I have been through. However, through it all I knew God was there. Below is a recount of the past month so it is long.
As many of you know, I did not have a close relationship with my dad but we had started working on our relationship a couple of months ago. A few weeks ago I took Em to see him (which I had done a few times over the past couple of months) but this trip I was different. I also took him a letter that I had written to let him know that I forgave him, and love him. I left the letter to read, but have heard for several that he did in fact read that letter. I knew that God was giving mydad another chance as well as my self. My dad had battled cirrhosis for over 15 years, and had been faced with death a lot of times during those years. At one point he was in a coma and not expected to make it through, but he fought his way out. During all of those years when God, Salvation, or anything dealing with religion was brought up he would disregard it.
On September 3rd, a wonderful man from my church went to talk to my dad, and my dad was SAVED! This was such a relief because before that we didn't know where he stood with God. It has since been said that God gave him chance after chance to be saved and that is why he had been able to fight through the sickness for so long.
On October 3 the doctor decided dialysis was no longer working and said that would be his last treatment. After an hour of dialysis my dad took himself off and decided to stop dialysis at that point. The doctors told us that if my dad was unable to make the decision we would have to decide if he went back to the nursing home, or to Hospice House. Hospice House was full, so we had to plan on the nursing home. He was taken back to the nursing home on Monday October 6th.
Ray and I took turns visiting but both of us would go at night. On Monday night (10/6) my dad was alert, talking, and picked up his Bible to read it. That was the only time in my life I saw my dad read the Bible. He told me when I left that he wanted me to bring him a biscuit the next morning. Side note I also saw a black bear on my way home which tickled me!
October 7 - I took his biscuit by, he was some what alert but nothing like the night before. He kept going to sleep while I was there, so I left for him to rest. Ray went around lunch and said he wasn't responding, just sleeping the entire time he was there. That night Ray asked me if I was okay going by myself so he could have some down time. On the way there I had a sense come over me that it would be the last night I would be making this trip. When I got there he was not responsive, and sleeping. He would begin coughing so I tried to give him some drink, and he couldn't hold the can up to drink from it. The only time he was vocal that night was to tell me that he loved me! As soon as I left I sent Steve a text that simply read "it is amazing what God gives you".
Wednesday morning around 2:30 he was transported to Annie Penn Hospital for what the nursing home thought was congestion, but it was the fluid building up in his lungs. He was never responsive or vocal. Tony arrived from Florida around 10 am, so all of us and our Grandfather and Uncle were with us. He passed away peacefully surrounded by family at 12 noon.
I know some of you wondered about a funeral - my dad decided to donate his body to science so we had no formal funeral. Once we receive his ashes back we will plan a memorial service.
Thank you again for all of your thoughts, prayers, and kind words. This was harder than I ever imagined it being, but I am thankful that God gave myself and my dad another chance before he was called home. Yesterday was 3 months since he passed, and we are beginning to to plan the Memorial Service which we hope he would be proud of.
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